I am very impressed. Makes me want to do some more art and have it enhanced by pros.
I think your critique is very good Tom. On all counts. Shortening and better read. But the edit stage for what you have in mind is past.But something I have decided for myself. Proceed. It can always be better. I most like the idea of it all occurring on one page.
A big part of the problem for the piece being static. I was into the pages as a production idea vs a storytelli or gag unfolding piece. I did my figures, did one background to drop in on a layer for all. That made it static. And actually harder than if I had recreated something slightly different each time.
Still and all, it is otherwise a very nice piece.
I agree about the "Early stage critique" bit ... but I'm always glad to read this for future reference. And you never know ... I might work with Joe to so something interesting with the backdrops. This theater is really kind of like the theater that is in Escape From New York, where it is cobbled together, slightly run down, etc. The one in Escape was REALLY run down, but I don't think I want to take it that far.So, in a word, Tom, Thanks!! You may actually see something happen that will compliment what you're saying. It's not too late.
The quickest way to get something different that might read a lot better. Do a select for all the gun nose figures, then do an adjustment layer of bringing them all the way down to black. Then paint into the adjustment layer and give yourself back just a little rim or backlight.
Maybe not all the way to black. Nearly
I like this contortionist theme.
I like the final shot, conked-ou of the floorboards--and the head turn + expression of the two "N"'s gives a lot of personality--can just imagine the movement and character there--funny!!